fuck this job.com

Well, the anger is gone. It took a Friday night and drinking myself to obvilion to get it to go.. Woke up the next morning no memory of the night before-still though the truth of Monday is there. No point of anger-it's useless. I'm going to the doctors in a few weeks time to be evaluated for depression. Perhaps all of this shite has been on my account-maybe I'm just a whinger-maybe I should have learned long ago to suck it up (even though it tastes like reguratated shit) and get on with it. Friday morning the HR manager found me after the morning bullshit meeting to let me know that they are not moving me from flooring. Noballs was a business decision-Ms.JW was a medical decision, and even though the store is hiring 55 more people for Spring/Summer-it's not fesiable at this time to transfer me. Maybe in a month or two something will change-but for now I have to stay put. I was (still am-but trying to bury it) so angry I went to the bogs to cry and had to control myself from wailing and punching the stall walls. I then had to go out and deal with customers but honestly my heart isn't in it and smiling is just not for me. Now it's Sunday and the thought of work tomorrow just makes me want to cry again. Though I know I have to go tomorrow and act like NORMAL (I don't know how I'm going to do it) and just work slow. I don't feel like talking to anyone- I'll do my best to smile at customers and get business but with coworkers and the like- I feel that they can go fuck themselves. But if I let this feeling show I have bad attitude and there's a reason to let me go and I can't afford it especially if the doctor finds that I need some happy pills to get through this shit they call life. Man this fucking hurts like a bastard!!